It is strange how dreams can reawaken emotions. Or is it vice versa? This week has been a semi-successful journey into friendship with someone very important to me. However, there have been a couple hiccups. One is a collection of still-lingering feelings, and the other is a dream I had last night. Could it be that those unconnected strands of emotion found a catalyst in my sub-conscious? Certainly so, it would seem, as dreams tend to affect me on an emotional level.
And then there was one confusing signal. While talking about a friend of ours who is experiencing relationship issues, I mentioned that there really are great guys out there without major issues, even if they are difficult to find. And she said, ” Or you end up pushing them away saying, ‘You’re smothering me!'” It did not really register with me at the time, because I just took it as a compliment that she was referring to me as a great guy. I laughed it off by saying, “Yeah, but a guy like that obviously has issues.” And that’s probably how she meant it – a nice compliment. Still, a little confusing. And I suppose she is sorting through her own feelings as well, so I should just let it slide for now and try to move forward. Yeah… that’s what I will try to do. I have to in order to be the friend she needs and deserves. So here goes…
Does the hand tilted against my leg
Retreat quickly or linger there?
Either is acceptable,
Although the latter is what drives
Me to fill my mind with
Scenes of imagined possibilities.
Or does that cautious look in her glance betray
Feelings that reach merely to shallow waters
Cavorting along the beach and in the white sands
Hovering over the sea inside me?
Return to the place where this journey began,
Immolate these things in the old fires and recline next to them
Swallowing up this darkness that threatens to consume us.
